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Growing Up



Coming Out
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Elf Life


My Life as an Elf

Date: Tue, 28 Feb 2006 17:56:12 -0800
To: amandil at timberwoof dot com
Subject: Web Site Contact: Elf
From: "None of your business." <>

Found: Brief browsing through Google; an accident

As many of these other "humans", as you call them (as if you aren't one yourself), have so violently expressed their opinions of how you think of yourself as an elf, I also believe that you should seek psychiatric help. There are many kind and considerate therapists who would be more than willing to help you sort out your problems. Seriously, now, if you wanted to attract visitors to your site, then all you needed to to was create a realistic and factual one (on a different topic) instead of spamming the Internet with these insane lies. I'm not sure whether you're simply crazed or you are only wanting attention, but whichever it is, seek mental help. Now, please.

With all due respect,


Hello, None.

Thank you for writing.

I don't recall having asked you for your psychiatric evaluation. I know that you didn't ask for mine, but since you consider it polite to psychoanalyze complete stranger, I can only assume that you would accept similar advice from me.

First, learn to read for context. On my web site I make it clear what my beliefs actually are. If you really think I really think I'm an elf, then it's fair of me to ask, what color is the sky on your world?

Second, learn about standards of abnormal psychology. Perhaps you could point out which disorder in DSM-IV you think I'm suffering from ... and the key word here is "suffering." If you knew me, you'd also know that I'm a happy, well-adjusted person.

Third, learn how to browse the web. The rest of my web site is realistic and factual.

Fourth, learn the correct meanings of words and do not accuse total strangers of things they obviously did not do. I did not "spam the Internet."

Fifth, keep your demands for conformance to normalcy to yourself. The world is obviously much richer and wonderful than you can accept. Don't try to drag others down to your sorry, monochomatic level of existence.

Sixth, don't lie. You said, "With all due respect", but you were disrespectful in assuming I need psychiatric help and in saying that I "spammed the Internet."


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My Life as an Elf: The Tale of Amândíl, Elf-Lord. Copyright © 1996, 1997, 2002, 2003. All Rights Reserved.
URL:; Contact: Amândíl’s Mailbox; Home Page: Timberwoof’s Den.